bahmer

Two men Slatten and Peewee pause their round of golf to smoke a cigar. Peewee pulls out a matchbox while Slattenr pulls the biggest lighter you've ever seen out of his golf bag and proceeds to light his cigar.

Peewee stares, laughs and says "Holy moly, that's the biggest lighter I've ever seen! It must be a foot long! That's hysterical. Where did you get it?!"

"Well," The Slatten sighs. "It's a long story."

"We have hours ahead of us." Pointed out Peewee.

"Alright, alright." Surrendered Slatten.

"Thing is, I found a magic lamp while practicing the other day, and the genie gave it to me."

Peewee is skeptical and laughs, just to have Slatten pull an old oil lamp out of his bag. Intrigued, Peewee rubs it, and sure enough, a genie pops out and offers a wish.

Peewee doesn't think twice: "I want a million bucks!"

The Genie nods, snaps his fingers, then disappears into a wisp of smoke. For a few minutes... nothing. Then, suddenly, a rumble in the distance.

The rumble gets louder and louder, when suddenly the skies darken and a flock of ducks flies over. There are hundreds, no thousands of them! For 10 minutes straight the sun is blocked out, and everyone is holding their ears to protect from the sound of a million ducks quacking.

Suddenly, as quickly as it started, it ended. As the sound slowly faded away, and as the last few straggling ducks flew over, Slatten and Peewee looked around at all the carnage, duck poop everywhere, golfing gear lying scattered as other golfers ran for cover.

Astounded, Peewee says "What the hell was that? I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks!"

"Yea he's a bit hard of hearing." Slatten sighs. "Did you really think I wished for a 12-inch Bic?"

Carol Kelly

That was funny and, Bahmer,coming from you! What can I say?

bahmer

Thank you. I think.

Carol Kelly

You’re always such a conservative gentleman, but it was funny. I needed a good laugh.

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

Well, Bahmer, I did get one hell'uva lighter out'ta the deal.

Tug484

Another genie joke...
A man found a lamp and rubbed it three times
A genie pops out and says, I'll Grant you three wishes, but I will also Grant your worst enemy three wishes.
Guy: Ok, I want 10 million dollars.
Genie: granted and your enemy gets 20 million
Guy: I want a really big mansion
Genie: granted and your enemy gets one twice the size.
Guy: Now beat me half to death

Big dog

Very good 😛🤪

debeda

Cute

bahmer

You can use it to light the grill when you cook outside.

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

Indeed, I do.

Peewee Loc: San Antonio, TX

Okay, your honorary Texan card is safe for the time being. Good one Bahm!

badbobby Loc: texas

ol bahm can concoct a goodun
every once in a while
but Slat should have wished that all records of his IOUs to badbobby were erased

bahmer

It appears that old Slats only thinks about is instant gratification is all.

Carol Kelly

Even funnier!

Tug484

Thank you