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Jul 7, 2019 10:41:37   #
eagleye13 (a regular here)
 
Years ago, a young Navy Pilot was injured while ejecting from his A-4 Skyhawk due to engine failure during a catapult shot from the carrier. Due to the heroics of rescue helicopter crew and the ship's hospital staff, the only permanent injury was the loss of one ear.

He remained on flight status and eventually became an Admiral. However, during his career he was always sensitive about his appearance.

One day the Admiral was interviewing two Navy Master Chiefs and a Marine Sergeant Major for his personal staff. The first Master Chief was a Surface Navy type and it was a great interview. At the end of the interview the Admiral asked him, "Do you notice anything different about me?"

The Master Chief answered, "Why, yes, Admiral. I couldn't help but notice that you are missing your starboard ear, so I don't know whether this impacts your hearing on that side."


The Admiral got very angry at this lack of tact and threw him out of his office.


The next candidate, an Aviation Master Chief, when asked this same question, answered, "Well yes, Sir, you seem to be short one ear."

The Admiral threw him out as well.


The third interview was with the Marine Sergeant Major. He was articulate, extremely sharp, and seemed to know more than the two Navy Master Chiefs put together. The Admiral wanted this guy but went ahead with the same question. "Do you notice anything different about me?"

To his surprise, the Sergeant Major said, "Yes Sir. You wear contact lenses."

The Admiral, impressed thought to himself, what an incredibly tactful Marine. "And how would you know that?" the Admiral asked.

The Sergeant Major replied: "Well, sir, it's pretty hard to wear glasses with only one fuckin' ear. "

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Jul 7, 2019 11:07:29   #
slatten49 (a regular here)
 
eagleye13 wrote:
Years ago, a young Navy Pilot was injured while ejecting from his A-4 Skyhawk due to engine failure during a catapult shot from the carrier. Due to the heroics of rescue helicopter crew and the ship's hospital staff, the only permanent injury was the loss of one ear.

He remained on flight status and eventually became an Admiral. However, during his career he was always sensitive about his appearance.

One day the Admiral was interviewing two Navy Master Chiefs and a Marine Sergeant Major for his personal staff. The first Master Chief was a Surface Navy type and it was a great interview. At the end of the interview the Admiral asked him, "Do you notice anything different about me?"

The Master Chief answered, "Why, yes, Admiral. I couldn't help but notice that you are missing your starboard ear, so I don't know whether this impacts your hearing on that side."


The Admiral got very angry at this lack of tact and threw him out of his office.


The next candidate, an Aviation Master Chief, when asked this same question, answered, "Well yes, Sir, you seem to be short one ear."

The Admiral threw him out as well.


The third interview was with the Marine Sergeant Major. He was articulate, extremely sharp, and seemed to know more than the two Navy Master Chiefs put together. The Admiral wanted this guy but went ahead with the same question. "Do you notice anything different about me?"

To his surprise, the Sergeant Major said, "Yes Sir. You wear contact lenses."

The Admiral, impressed thought to himself, what an incredibly tactful Marine. "And how would you know that?" the Admiral asked.

The Sergeant Major replied: "Well, sir, it's pretty hard to wear glasses with only one fuckin' ear. "
Years ago, a young Navy Pilot was injured while ej... (show quote)

For this Marine, an oldie but a goodie well worth repeating.

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Jul 7, 2019 11:11:32   #
slatten49 (a regular here)
 
slatten49 wrote:
For this Marine, an oldie but a goodie well worth repeating.

And, from this old Marine, another worth repeating...

The Pentagon recently found it had too many generals and offered an early retirement bonus. They went through many retirement plans but nothing seemed to please everyone.

In the end, desperate, they promised any general who retired immediately his full annual benefits plus $10,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points on the general's body, with the general getting to select any pair of points he wished.

The first man, an Air Force general, accepted. He asked the pension man to measure from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. Six feet.

He walked out with a check of $720,000.

The second man, an Army general, asked them to measure from the tip of his up-stretched hands to his toes. Eight feet. He walked out with a check for $960,000.

When the third general, a grizzled old Marine General, was asked where to measure, he told the pension man: "From the tip of my penis to my testicles."

The pension man suggested that perhaps the Marine general might like to reconsider, pointing out the nice checks the previous two generals had received. The Marine general insisted and the pension expert said that would be fine, but that he'd better get the medical officer to do the measuring.

The medical officer attended and asked the general to drop 'em. He did. The medical officer placed the tape on the tip of the general's penis and began to work back. "My God man!" he said, "where are your testicles?"

"Vietnam," smiled the USMC General.

SEMPER FI

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Jul 7, 2019 13:23:45   #
RT friend (a regular here)
 
Army and Navy well we'll represented here, maybe Trump had a sneaking suspicion something like this was going to happen so he got in first with the airport.

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Jul 7, 2019 13:48:50   #
Carol Kelly (a regular here)
 
eagleye13 wrote:
Years ago, a young Navy Pilot was injured while ejecting from his A-4 Skyhawk due to engine failure during a catapult shot from the carrier. Due to the heroics of rescue helicopter crew and the ship's hospital staff, the only permanent injury was the loss of one ear.

He remained on flight status and eventually became an Admiral. However, during his career he was always sensitive about his appearance.

One day the Admiral was interviewing two Navy Master Chiefs and a Marine Sergeant Major for his personal staff. The first Master Chief was a Surface Navy type and it was a great interview. At the end of the interview the Admiral asked him, "Do you notice anything different about me?"

The Master Chief answered, "Why, yes, Admiral. I couldn't help but notice that you are missing your starboard ear, so I don't know whether this impacts your hearing on that side."


The Admiral got very angry at this lack of tact and threw him out of his office.


The next candidate, an Aviation Master Chief, when asked this same question, answered, "Well yes, Sir, you seem to be short one ear."

The Admiral threw him out as well.


The third interview was with the Marine Sergeant Major. He was articulate, extremely sharp, and seemed to know more than the two Navy Master Chiefs put together. The Admiral wanted this guy but went ahead with the same question. "Do you notice anything different about me?"

To his surprise, the Sergeant Major said, "Yes Sir. You wear contact lenses."

The Admiral, impressed thought to himself, what an incredibly tactful Marine. "And how would you know that?" the Admiral asked.

The Sergeant Major replied: "Well, sir, it's pretty hard to wear glasses with only one fuckin' ear. "
Years ago, a young Navy Pilot was injured while ej... (show quote)


My husband and I laughed out loud. The thing is he seldom finds very much amusing. The military life can be fun.

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Jul 7, 2019 13:51:59   #
Carol Kelly (a regular here)
 
slatten49 wrote:
And, from this old Marine, another worth repeating...

The Pentagon recently found it had too many generals and offered an early retirement bonus. They went through many retirement plans but nothing seemed to please everyone.

In the end, desperate, they promised any general who retired immediately his full annual benefits plus $10,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points on the general's body, with the general getting to select any pair of points he wished.

The first man, an Air Force general, accepted. He asked the pension man to measure from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. Six feet.

He walked out with a check of $720,000.

The second man, an Army general, asked them to measure from the tip of his up-stretched hands to his toes. Eight feet. He walked out with a check for $960,000.

When the third general, a grizzled old Marine General, was asked where to measure, he told the pension man: "From the tip of my penis to my testicles."

The pension man suggested that perhaps the Marine general might like to reconsider, pointing out the nice checks the previous two generals had received. The Marine general insisted and the pension expert said that would be fine, but that he'd better get the medical officer to do the measuring.

The medical officer attended and asked the general to drop 'em. He did. The medical officer placed the tape on the tip of the general's penis and began to work back. "My God man!" he said, "where are your testicles?"

"Vietnam," smiled the USMC General.

SEMPER FI
And, from this old Marine, another worth repeating... (show quote)


We loved that one, too. Thanks, guys for great laughs.

| Reply
Jul 7, 2019 14:02:42   #
badbobby (a regular here)
 
slatten49 wrote:
And, from this old Marine, another worth repeating...

The Pentagon recently found it had too many generals and offered an early retirement bonus. They went through many retirement plans but nothing seemed to please everyone.

In the end, desperate, they promised any general who retired immediately his full annual benefits plus $10,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points on the general's body, with the general getting to select any pair of points he wished.

The first man, an Air Force general, accepted. He asked the pension man to measure from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. Six feet.

He walked out with a check of $720,000.

The second man, an Army general, asked them to measure from the tip of his up-stretched hands to his toes. Eight feet. He walked out with a check for $960,000.

When the third general, a grizzled old Marine General, was asked where to measure, he told the pension man: "From the tip of my penis to my testicles."

The pension man suggested that perhaps the Marine general might like to reconsider, pointing out the nice checks the previous two generals had received. The Marine general insisted and the pension expert said that would be fine, but that he'd better get the medical officer to do the measuring.

The medical officer attended and asked the general to drop 'em. He did. The medical officer placed the tape on the tip of the general's penis and began to work back. "My God man!" he said, "where are your testicles?"

"Vietnam," smiled the USMC General.

SEMPER FI
And, from this old Marine, another worth repeating... (show quote)


so much for praising Leathernecks
kinda makes me sick to my stomach
but that's ok
I really feel like we have a real need for Marines
after all think of the many doorways that need guarding


| Reply
Jul 7, 2019 14:16:44   #
Carol Kelly (a regular here)
 
badbobby wrote:
so much for praising Leathernecks
kinda makes me sick to my stomach
but that's ok
I really feel like we have a real need for Marines
after all think of the many doorways that need guarding



They do it exceedingly well and when they aren’t deployed to foreign shores, they do things for the community. And they have a comradely slogan...Semper fi. No other service has that, at least to my knowledge. If I’m wrong, I’m certain I’ll be corrected.

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Jul 7, 2019 14:22:01   #
slatten49 (a regular here)
 
Carol Kelly wrote:
They do it exceedingly well and when they aren’t deployed to foreign shores, they do things for the community. And they have a comradely slogan...Semper fi. No other service has that, at least to my knowledge. If I’m wrong, I’m certain I’ll be corrected.

You're a lady after my heart, Carol K.

SEMPER FI..."The change is forever "

BadBobby is simply a disgruntled Squid and wan'nabee Marine.

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Jul 7, 2019 14:43:10   #
badbobby (a regular here)
 
slatten49 wrote:
You're a lady after my heart, Carol K.

SEMPER FI..."The change is forever "

BadBobby is simply a disgruntled Squid and wan'nabee Marine.


I passed the Navy's entrance exam
and didn't have to settle for the lesser part of the Navy---the Marine Corps
podrecito
and I was never very good at guarding doors

| Reply
Jul 7, 2019 14:45:59   #
slatten49 (a regular here)
 
badbobby wrote:
I passed the Navy's entrance exam
and didn't have to settle for the lesser part of the Navy---the Marine Corps
podrecito
and I was never very good at guarding doors

Heck, you can't even guard against poor poker hands.


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Jul 7, 2019 14:49:57   #
Carol Kelly (a regular here)
 
badbobby wrote:
I passed the Navy's entrance exam
and didn't have to settle for the lesser part of the Navy---the Marine Corps
podrecito
and I was never very good at guarding doors


At Air South, NATO, in Naples, they guarded the doors and were very sharp.

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Jul 7, 2019 14:50:51   #
Larai (a regular here)
 
badbobby wrote:
I passed the Navy's entrance exam
and didn't have to settle for the lesser part of the Navy---the Marine Corps
podrecito
and I was never very good at guarding doors


My Hubby was navy, deceased now, I was born on the Marine Corps Birthday! SEMPER FI! my hubby used to like to mess with me.. He'd call me a sea going bell hop.. or a target, & I'd call him a freakin taxi... he once asked if I knew how to carry a bucket of steam above deck I told him yea.. turn the bucket upside down.! lol..

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Jul 7, 2019 14:52:30   #
badbobby (a regular here)
 
Carol Kelly wrote:
At Air South, NATO, in Naples, they guarded the doors and were very sharp.


keep it up Carol
and the dastardly one will make you an honorary Jarhead
then I'll have to pick on you too

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Jul 7, 2019 15:12:14   #
slatten49 (a regular here)
 
Larai wrote:
My Hubby was navy, deceased now, I was born on the Marine Corps Birthday! SEMPER FI! my hubby used to like to mess with me.. He'd call me a sea going bell hop.. or a target, & I'd call him a freakin taxi... he once asked if I knew how to carry a bucket of steam above deck I told him yea.. turn the bucket upside down.! lol..

SEMPER FI, Larai You are now an honorary BAM.

My children's godfather, retired USMC Major General Ed Meyers, was called a "sea-going bellhop" by my father-in-law, a durn Squid. The general's response "The last belles I hopped were your two sisters."

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