A Perfect Day
May 28, 2014 22:01:06 #
The forecast had been for wind and rain the next morning but when Pastor Frank woke up, it was a perfect day...for golf. But he was supposed to lead services. "Get behind me, Satan," he mumbled as his mind started to figure out how to get to play. Obviously, Satan did not and the plan was hatched.
He called the assistant pastor and asked if he would take over his duties, saying he felt "under the weather," which was not exactly a lie, in a way. As soon as the assistant left, he got from under the covers fully dressed, got his clubs out of the closet, and snuck out the backdoor to his car.
The first hole is 398 yds, Par 4. The angels are standing around God and smiling, knowing all heaven is about to break loose on this hapless soul. The pastor swings and hits a terrible slice...which lands on the cement pathway and races for another two hundred yds before it strikes a crack and flies up onto the fairway; he is only thirty yards from the cup and chips it in. The angels are puzzled but then think God is just setting him for the big one.
The next hole is a 260 yds, Par 3 over water. The pastor tees up, swings and--a hole-in-one! By the time he is teeing for the ninth, he has a record-smashing score of 17. The angels are stunned. God rewarding sin? They push Michael up to get some answers. "Father, I know your ways are mysteries and we should not question what you do but this man has wantonly disobeyed his office and you: why give him the very thing his carnal heart most desires?" God turns and smiles at Michael. "Yes, the very thing he most desires...but who can he tell?"
He called the assistant pastor and asked if he would take over his duties, saying he felt "under the weather," which was not exactly a lie, in a way. As soon as the assistant left, he got from under the covers fully dressed, got his clubs out of the closet, and snuck out the backdoor to his car.
The first hole is 398 yds, Par 4. The angels are standing around God and smiling, knowing all heaven is about to break loose on this hapless soul. The pastor swings and hits a terrible slice...which lands on the cement pathway and races for another two hundred yds before it strikes a crack and flies up onto the fairway; he is only thirty yards from the cup and chips it in. The angels are puzzled but then think God is just setting him for the big one.
The next hole is a 260 yds, Par 3 over water. The pastor tees up, swings and--a hole-in-one! By the time he is teeing for the ninth, he has a record-smashing score of 17. The angels are stunned. God rewarding sin? They push Michael up to get some answers. "Father, I know your ways are mysteries and we should not question what you do but this man has wantonly disobeyed his office and you: why give him the very thing his carnal heart most desires?" God turns and smiles at Michael. "Yes, the very thing he most desires...but who can he tell?"
May 28, 2014 22:10:59 #
rumitoid wrote:
The forecast had been for wind and rain the next m... (show quote)
:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: :lol: :lol:
May 29, 2014 03:20:59 #
May 30, 2014 22:52:14 #
rumitoid wrote:
The forecast had been for wind and rain the next m... (show quote)
Good one! Thank you. Guess not a lot of golfers here; that would be extremely cruel and unusual punishment.
May 31, 2014 10:06:51 #
rumitoid wrote:
The forecast had been for wind and rain the next m... (show quote)
Dang! You beat me to it. I was just thinking of posting that one. Get a chuckle every time I think of it because it plays on human nature to the hilt.
May 31, 2014 18:57:10 #
dennisimoto wrote:
Dang! You beat me to it. I was just thinking of posting that one. Get a chuckle every time I think of it because it plays on human nature to the hilt.
Perfect torment, lol.
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