Jeff Bezos Chooses Soon-to-Be Bankrupt Mar-a-Lago as New Amazon Headquarters
Feb 14, 2019 17:32:42 #
Bad Bob
Loc: Virginia
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/jeff-bezos-chooses-soon-to-be-bankrupt-mar-a-lago-as-new-amazon-headquarters?utm_campaign=aud-dev&utm_source=nl&utm_brand=tny&utm_mailing=TNY_Borowitz_021419&utm_medium=email&bxid=5be9d7bc3f92a40469e73439&user_id=39115857&esrc=right_rail_humor&utm_term=TNY_Borowitz
SEATTLE (The Borowitz Report)—Stating that he expected the property to be “bankrupt and vacant within the next two years,” Jeff Bezos, the founder of Amazon, announced on Thursday that the Mar-a-Lago club, in Palm Beach, Florida, would be the site of Amazon’s second headquarters.
Bezos said that Mar-a-Lago was chosen from a list of soon-to-be-bankrupt properties, including the Trump National Golf Club Bedminster, Trump Turnberry, and the Trump International Hotel and Tower in Baku, Azerbaijan.
The Amazon C.E.O. said that, after Amazon acquires Mar-a-Lago, the company will start working around the clock to remove the property’s hideous décor, which he fears could prove distracting to warehouse employees.
At Mar-a-Lago, a longtime employee, who spoke on condition of anonymity, welcomed the Amazon move, stating, “This is one of the only places in the world where workplace conditions would improve if Amazon came in.”
Another Mar-a-Lago employee, raising a question shared by many others, asked, “Does this mean we’ll start getting paid?”
If the Mar-a-Lago deal goes through, it would mark the first appearance of books in that location, Amazon confirmed.
SEATTLE (The Borowitz Report)—Stating that he expected the property to be “bankrupt and vacant within the next two years,” Jeff Bezos, the founder of Amazon, announced on Thursday that the Mar-a-Lago club, in Palm Beach, Florida, would be the site of Amazon’s second headquarters.
Bezos said that Mar-a-Lago was chosen from a list of soon-to-be-bankrupt properties, including the Trump National Golf Club Bedminster, Trump Turnberry, and the Trump International Hotel and Tower in Baku, Azerbaijan.
The Amazon C.E.O. said that, after Amazon acquires Mar-a-Lago, the company will start working around the clock to remove the property’s hideous décor, which he fears could prove distracting to warehouse employees.
At Mar-a-Lago, a longtime employee, who spoke on condition of anonymity, welcomed the Amazon move, stating, “This is one of the only places in the world where workplace conditions would improve if Amazon came in.”
Another Mar-a-Lago employee, raising a question shared by many others, asked, “Does this mean we’ll start getting paid?”
If the Mar-a-Lago deal goes through, it would mark the first appearance of books in that location, Amazon confirmed.
Feb 14, 2019 18:12:16 #
Bad Bob wrote:
I hope the people running the auction of confiscated property seized under RICO from organized criminals hold out to get top dollar for taxpayers.
Feb 14, 2019 18:38:19 #
Bad Bob wrote:
Satire from The Borowitz Report (at the top of the article). Lest anyone be foolish enough to buy into this fever dream.Feb 14, 2019 19:30:33 #
Fit2BTied wrote:
Satire from The Borowitz Report (at the top of the article). Lest anyone be foolish enough to buy into this fever dream.
But good satire...
Feb 14, 2019 21:25:59 #
Canuckus Deploracus wrote:
But good satire...
Now you went and spoiled Kevyn's wet dream. He believed it.
Feb 14, 2019 21:30:17 #
Smedley_buzk**l wrote:
Now you went and spoiled Kevyn's wet dream. He believed it.
He's a p*******e anyways and hopes the democrats will make
sex with a minor legal!
SEMPER FI
Feb 14, 2019 23:06:59 #
Canuckus Deploracus wrote:
Borowitz can be humorous but his act is getting a little tired. Like Alec Baldwin doing Trump. But good satire...
Feb 14, 2019 23:33:49 #
Fit2BTied wrote:
Borowitz can be humorous but his act is getting a little tired. Like Alec Baldwin doing Trump.
Baldwin stopped be funny long ago..
Which is too bad...
I really enjoyed him once upon a time...
Feb 15, 2019 07:16:30 #
Amazon just pulled out of a deal to establish a 2nd HQ in New York. The libs scared Bezos out of creating jobs and tax income for New York. Good job Libs and Dems!! Democratic government leaders continue to prove that they can screw up an economy.
MAGA!!
MAGA!!
Feb 15, 2019 07:39:14 #
snowbear37 wrote:
Amazon just pulled out of a deal to establish a 2nd HQ in New York. The libs scared Bezos out of creating jobs and tax income for New York. Good job Libs and Dems!! Democratic government leaders continue to prove that they can screw up an economy.
MAGA!!
MAGA!!
I've read that Amazon pulled out of the deal because of pressure from New Jerk officials to let employees unionize. But that still does excuse dumber that a box of rocks bimbo AOC for not knowing that giving someone a tax break isn’t fungible money, it can’t be used elsewhere.
Does anybody but ignorant moonbats pay any attention to this jackass toothed b***h?
Feb 15, 2019 07:55:06 #
buffalo wrote:
I've read that Amazon pulled out of the deal because of pressure from New Jerk officials to let employees unionize. But that still does excuse dumber that a box of rocks bimbo AOC for not knowing that giving someone a tax break isn’t fungible money, it can’t be used elsewhere.
Does anybody but ignorant moonbats pay any attention to this jackass toothed b***h?
Does anybody but ignorant moonbats pay any attention to this jackass toothed b***h?
She is the best thing that's happened for Conservatives! LOL
Feb 15, 2019 08:57:27 #
Feb 15, 2019 11:00:15 #
youngwilliam
Loc: Deep in the heart
mongo wrote:
He's a p*******e anyways and hopes the democrats will make
sex with a minor legal!
SEMPER FI
sex with a minor legal!
SEMPER FI
Kevy likes animal porno also.
Feb 15, 2019 11:40:37 #
Feb 15, 2019 11:48:02 #
mongo wrote:
He's a p*******e anyways and hopes the democrats will make
sex with a minor legal!
SEMPER FI
sex with a minor legal!
SEMPER FI
It's already legal in Texas, they don't enforce anything over 14
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