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laff a lil
Jan 2, 2019 11:14:26   #
badbobby Loc: texas
 
Love

A teacher asks a student:
"What kind of woman would you like to be with when you're all grown up?"
"A woman like the moon!" Answers the kid.
"That's beautiful," breathes the teacher, "what a choice! Because you'd like her to be beautiful and radiant like the moon?"
"No, I'd like her to appear at night and disappear come morning!"


Death

After bob died, everyone gathered at his funeral. Then the minister started to speak: "He was a model husband, a decent man, a terrific father.."
The widow then makes a motion for her son to come to her.
"What is it mother?" he whisper.
"Dear, go check the casket, I think we're at the wrong funeral..."

Hope

Wife: "What are you doing?"
Husband: "Nothing."
Wife: "What do you mean nothing? You've been staring at our marriage certificate for over an hour!"
Husband: "Yea, I'm checking the expiration date."



Neighbors

"The new neighbors are so in love," remarks Susan to her husband, "he hugs her, kisses her and strokes her hair. Why don't you do that?"
"Because I don't know her that well."


Donations

Knock on the door.
"Hello sir, would you like to contribute something to the old folks home?"
"Yes, actually." Beams the old man.
"Inge, put your jacket on and pack a suitcase!"


Shopping

An elderly couple is walking in the city, hand in hand, when they pass a jewelery store.
The wife turns to her husband with a smile:
"Love, would you buy me a chain?"
"Why?" Asks the husband, "Tired of being free?"


Qualities

A woman asks her husband:
"What do you like about me the most? My beautiful face or my sexy body?"
The husband gives her a long, appreciating look.
"Your sense of humor."



Reply
Jan 2, 2019 11:17:32   #
bahmer
 
badbobby wrote:
Love

A teacher asks a student:
"What kind of woman would you like to be with when you're all grown up?"
"A woman like the moon!" Answers the kid.
"That's beautiful," breathes the teacher, "what a choice! Because you'd like her to be beautiful and radiant like the moon?"
"No, I'd like her to appear at night and disappear come morning!"


Death

After bob died, everyone gathered at his funeral. Then the minister started to speak: "He was a model husband, a decent man, a terrific father.."
The widow then makes a motion for her son to come to her.
"What is it mother?" he whisper.
"Dear, go check the casket, I think we're at the wrong funeral..."

Hope

Wife: "What are you doing?"
Husband: "Nothing."
Wife: "What do you mean nothing? You've been staring at our marriage certificate for over an hour!"
Husband: "Yea, I'm checking the expiration date."



Neighbors

"The new neighbors are so in love," remarks Susan to her husband, "he hugs her, kisses her and strokes her hair. Why don't you do that?"
"Because I don't know her that well."


Donations

Knock on the door.
"Hello sir, would you like to contribute something to the old folks home?"
"Yes, actually." Beams the old man.
"Inge, put your jacket on and pack a suitcase!"


Shopping

An elderly couple is walking in the city, hand in hand, when they pass a jewelery store.
The wife turns to her husband with a smile:
"Love, would you buy me a chain?"
"Why?" Asks the husband, "Tired of being free?"


Qualities

A woman asks her husband:
"What do you like about me the most? My beautiful face or my sexy body?"
The husband gives her a long, appreciating look.
"Your sense of humor."
Love br br A teacher asks a student: br "Wha... (show quote)


And with that last out brake badbobby was chained to the
doghouse for three weeks straight.

Reply
Jan 2, 2019 17:33:34   #
Canuckus Deploracus Loc: North of the wall
 
I asked the last one once....
My wife is still laughing...
I believe she was reading one of Badbobby's jokes at the time

Reply
 
 
Jan 2, 2019 17:58:50   #
badbobby Loc: texas
 
Canuckus Deploracus wrote:
I asked the last one once....
My wife is still laughing...
I believe she was reading one of Badbobby's jokes at the time


just so she ware'nt in my Jack

Reply
Jan 2, 2019 18:01:16   #
bahmer
 
badbobby wrote:
just so she ware'nt in my Jack


Everybody knows not to touch your Jack or they will have the
fury of hell descend upon them from you.

Reply
Jan 2, 2019 18:05:39   #
Canuckus Deploracus Loc: North of the wall
 
badbobby wrote:
just so she ware'nt in my Jack


My wife challenges you to an online drinkathon.... Never mind , she's down...
That warm up shot was a k**ler...

Reply
Jan 4, 2019 01:04:55   #
debeda
 
badbobby wrote:
Love

A teacher asks a student:
"What kind of woman would you like to be with when you're all grown up?"
"A woman like the moon!" Answers the kid.
"That's beautiful," breathes the teacher, "what a choice! Because you'd like her to be beautiful and radiant like the moon?"
"No, I'd like her to appear at night and disappear come morning!"


Death

After bob died, everyone gathered at his funeral. Then the minister started to speak: "He was a model husband, a decent man, a terrific father.."
The widow then makes a motion for her son to come to her.
"What is it mother?" he whisper.
"Dear, go check the casket, I think we're at the wrong funeral..."

Hope

Wife: "What are you doing?"
Husband: "Nothing."
Wife: "What do you mean nothing? You've been staring at our marriage certificate for over an hour!"
Husband: "Yea, I'm checking the expiration date."



Neighbors

"The new neighbors are so in love," remarks Susan to her husband, "he hugs her, kisses her and strokes her hair. Why don't you do that?"
"Because I don't know her that well."


Donations

Knock on the door.
"Hello sir, would you like to contribute something to the old folks home?"
"Yes, actually." Beams the old man.
"Inge, put your jacket on and pack a suitcase!"


Shopping

An elderly couple is walking in the city, hand in hand, when they pass a jewelery store.
The wife turns to her husband with a smile:
"Love, would you buy me a chain?"
"Why?" Asks the husband, "Tired of being free?"


Qualities

A woman asks her husband:
"What do you like about me the most? My beautiful face or my sexy body?"
The husband gives her a long, appreciating look.
"Your sense of humor."
Love br br A teacher asks a student: br "Wha... (show quote)


HILARIOUS lolololololololhahahahahaha

Reply
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