badbobby Loc: texas

When we sayOPP, we don't mean people from somewhere else! . Enjoy this collection of hilarious 'OPP jokes!





Archie's wife wakes up her husband in the middle of the night.

"What happened?" Archie asks worriedly.

"Nothing..." said his wife, "I just don't understand how you can sleep with such a small salary."

* * *

Peewee tell his daughter: "My darling, don't marry this man. He's crippled, ugly and an orphan."

The daughter, surprised and angry, tells him: "I only care about love, daddy, I don't care about his looks or his background."

Peeweer says to her: "I'm not talking about that. Don't you think he's suffered enough?"

* * *

moldy oldy goes to the doctor and complains: "Doc I have a problem, my wife is c***ting on me, but I'm not growing any horns!"

The doctor, amused, explains to him that the whole c***ting and horns thing is only a metaphor.

moldy breaths in relief. "Thank god! I thought I was low on Calcium!"

* * *

Two OPP husbands are talking.

One says: "My best friend, Jimmy, ran away with my wife."
The second asks: "Is he still your best friend?"

"Not since he brought her back."


* * *

N P says to his friend Slatten: "Don't ask, my parrot died."
Slatten: "Of old age?"
"No, of frustration. Since I got married he hasn't been able to get a word in edgewise."

* * *


A AuntiE asks her daughter: "I understand you've been having some disagreements with your fiance' about the wedding?"
The daughter: "Just small things, like I want a white dress and he doesn't want to get married."


* * *


"Will you cry at my funeral?" Asks Canuck

"Sure," answers the wife, "you know I cry over the silliest things."

no propaganda please Loc: moon orbiting the third rock from the sun

And we both enjoyed the parrot--stuffed with bacon and celery . No use for a frustrated parrot, even one that finally shut up.

NPP and SWMBO

Liberty Tree

Kevyn told Bahmer, " I know when I die you will be right there to spit on my grave." Bahmer replied, " Not me, I h**e standing in long lines."

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

BB, just like Dale Carnegie, you continue to make friends and influence people. Long ago, you learned to stop worrying and enjoy life.

Ya' durn Squid.

Again, Happy New Year, ol' feller.

bahmer

Thanks for the laughs there badbobby.

AuntiE Loc: 45th Least Free State

Would someone introduce me to said daughter?

bahmer

You will have to talk to babdobby about that AuntiE.

badbobby Loc: texas

since you don't have one
I''l offer you one a mine





but beware
she'll have her hand out

bahmer

That may cause a rift in your family.

badbobby Loc: texas

AuntiE sounded lonely
jus tryin to help

Canuckus Deploracus Loc: North of the wall

Thanks for the laughs Badbobby and Happy New Year to you and yours...
My wife says your a gentleman for leaving out the "little"...

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

Yeah, BB, you're one heck'uva guy.

badbobby Loc: texas

thanks Slat
I know you mean that from your heart

badbobby Loc: texas

I don't know that much about you Canuck


yet

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

Naturally.

BTW, Squidly… https://www.onepoliticalplaza.com/t-149444-1.html#2690090