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Name calling, labeling and problem resolution
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Feb 15, 2014 07:41:36   #
lpnmajor Loc: Arkansas
 
You are all i***ts. Does that statement upset you? Would it be easier to swallow if I said I was an i***t too? The answers would be yes and no, respectively, I expect. No, I am not actually calling any of you i***ts, that was a ploy. The point is, name calling doesn't do anything, except distract from the discussion. I AM an i***t sometimes, but I decide that, not you. When someone calls me a name, I either own it or forget it and then I'm done with it. It means nothing.

Labeling things or people doesn't change a thing about them or it, it only changes your attitude towards them. One person gives a dollar to a homeless man, another gives a sandwich. Which one is a liberal and which a conservative? I bet you tried to answer that question, but here's the thing, you can't, because you don't know WHY each person did what they did. You tried to label them anyway, with little information, because that's the way we have learned to do things. I suggest we stop "reading between the lines" and "mind reading" when dealing with people.. Labeling is actually SELF destructive, as it closes our minds to possibilities that might be of benefit to us.

Resolving problems first requires identifying the problem and the problem is NEVER ideology. The color orange is a certain frequency in the light spectrum and one's ideology has no effect on that. Accepting different viewpoints as valid, does not change ideology. From one perspective, the orange may appear more red, from another more yellow, but it is STILL orange. That means that all viewpoints have value and using the aggregate of them can lead to a more complete picture. Rejecting another viewpoint because it differs from one's own, is a self defeating action. Trying to get a glimpse of the bigger picture, REQUIRES examining other viewpoints. Those with a camera phone mentality will never have the IMAX 360 ability to deal effectively with problems. Too many people use "selfies" as their way of understanding the World.

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Feb 15, 2014 07:52:08   #
Coos Bay Tom Loc: coos bay oregon
 
I concur
lpnmajor wrote:
You are all i***ts. Does that statement upset you? Would it be easier to swallow if I said I was an i***t too? The answers would be yes and no, respectively, I expect. No, I am not actually calling any of you i***ts, that was a ploy. The point is, name calling doesn't do anything, except distract from the discussion. I AM an i***t sometimes, but I decide that, not you. When someone calls me a name, I either own it or forget it and then I'm done with it. It means nothing.

Labeling things or people doesn't change a thing about them or it, it only changes your attitude towards them. One person gives a dollar to a homeless man, another gives a sandwich. Which one is a liberal and which a conservative? I bet you tried to answer that question, but here's the thing, you can't, because you don't know WHY each person did what they did. You tried to label them anyway, with little information, because that's the way we have learned to do things. I suggest we stop "reading between the lines" and "mind reading" when dealing with people.. Labeling is actually SELF destructive, as it closes our minds to possibilities that might be of benefit to us.

Resolving problems first requires identifying the problem and the problem is NEVER ideology. The color orange is a certain frequency in the light spectrum and one's ideology has no effect on that. Accepting different viewpoints as valid, does not change ideology. From one perspective, the orange may appear more red, from another more yellow, but it is STILL orange. That means that all viewpoints have value and using the aggregate of them can lead to a more complete picture. Rejecting another viewpoint because it differs from one's own, is a self defeating action. Trying to get a glimpse of the bigger picture, REQUIRES examining other viewpoints. Those with a camera phone mentality will never have the IMAX 360 ability to deal effectively with problems. Too many people use "selfies" as their way of understanding the World.
You are all i***ts. Does that statement upset you?... (show quote)


:thumbup:

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Feb 15, 2014 08:10:32   #
Bigmac495 Loc: Indiana
 
lpnmajor wrote:
You are all i***ts. Does that statement upset you? Would it be easier to swallow if I said I was an i***t too? The answers would be yes and no, respectively, I expect. No, I am not actually calling any of you i***ts, that was a ploy. The point is, name calling doesn't do anything, except distract from the discussion. I AM an i***t sometimes, but I decide that, not you. When someone calls me a name, I either own it or forget it and then I'm done with it. It means nothing.

Labeling things or people doesn't change a thing about them or it, it only changes your attitude towards them. One person gives a dollar to a homeless man, another gives a sandwich. Which one is a liberal and which a conservative? I bet you tried to answer that question, but here's the thing, you can't, because you don't know WHY each person did what they did. You tried to label them anyway, with little information, because that's the way we have learned to do things. I suggest we stop "reading between the lines" and "mind reading" when dealing with people.. Labeling is actually SELF destructive, as it closes our minds to possibilities that might be of benefit to us.

Resolving problems first requires identifying the problem and the problem is NEVER ideology. The color orange is a certain frequency in the light spectrum and one's ideology has no effect on that. Accepting different viewpoints as valid, does not change ideology. From one perspective, the orange may appear more red, from another more yellow, but it is STILL orange. That means that all viewpoints have value and using the aggregate of them can lead to a more complete picture. Rejecting another viewpoint because it differs from one's own, is a self defeating action. Trying to get a glimpse of the bigger picture, REQUIRES examining other viewpoints. Those with a camera phone mentality will never have the IMAX 360 ability to deal effectively with problems. Too many people use "selfies" as their way of understanding the World.
You are all i***ts. Does that statement upset you?... (show quote)


Good posting , I agree.

Reply
 
 
Feb 15, 2014 08:53:40   #
Searching Loc: Rural Southwest VA
 
lpnmajor wrote:
You are all i***ts. Does that statement upset you? Would it be easier to swallow if I said I was an i***t too? The answers would be yes and no, respectively, I expect. No, I am not actually calling any of you i***ts, that was a ploy. The point is, name calling doesn't do anything, except distract from the discussion. I AM an i***t sometimes, but I decide that, not you. When someone calls me a name, I either own it or forget it and then I'm done with it. It means nothing.

Labeling things or people doesn't change a thing about them or it, it only changes your attitude towards them. One person gives a dollar to a homeless man, another gives a sandwich. Which one is a liberal and which a conservative? I bet you tried to answer that question, but here's the thing, you can't, because you don't know WHY each person did what they did. You tried to label them anyway, with little information, because that's the way we have learned to do things. I suggest we stop "reading between the lines" and "mind reading" when dealing with people.. Labeling is actually SELF destructive, as it closes our minds to possibilities that might be of benefit to us.

Resolving problems first requires identifying the problem and the problem is NEVER ideology. The color orange is a certain frequency in the light spectrum and one's ideology has no effect on that. Accepting different viewpoints as valid, does not change ideology. From one perspective, the orange may appear more red, from another more yellow, but it is STILL orange. That means that all viewpoints have value and using the aggregate of them can lead to a more complete picture. Rejecting another viewpoint because it differs from one's own, is a self defeating action. Trying to get a glimpse of the bigger picture, REQUIRES examining other viewpoints. Those with a camera phone mentality will never have the IMAX 360 ability to deal effectively with problems. Too many people use "selfies" as their way of understanding the World.
You are all i***ts. Does that statement upset you?... (show quote)


Oh, a topic whose time has come, overdue perhaps! :thumbup: Kudos to you for expounding so objectively on a conundrum that goes to the heart of the matter. I get a daily thought from Brian Andreas Story People -- this morning's, how appropriate --"Dark Garden" -- "I once had a garden filled with flowers that grew only on dark thoughts, but they need constant care and one day I decided I had better things to do." Your garden must be a visual delight this grey morning -- a r**t of beautiful colors.

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Feb 15, 2014 09:53:27   #
rumitoid
 
lpnmajor wrote:
You are all i***ts. Does that statement upset you? Would it be easier to swallow if I said I was an i***t too? The answers would be yes and no, respectively, I expect. No, I am not actually calling any of you i***ts, that was a ploy. The point is, name calling doesn't do anything, except distract from the discussion. I AM an i***t sometimes, but I decide that, not you. When someone calls me a name, I either own it or forget it and then I'm done with it. It means nothing.

Labeling things or people doesn't change a thing about them or it, it only changes your attitude towards them. One person gives a dollar to a homeless man, another gives a sandwich. Which one is a liberal and which a conservative? I bet you tried to answer that question, but here's the thing, you can't, because you don't know WHY each person did what they did. You tried to label them anyway, with little information, because that's the way we have learned to do things. I suggest we stop "reading between the lines" and "mind reading" when dealing with people.. Labeling is actually SELF destructive, as it closes our minds to possibilities that might be of benefit to us.

Resolving problems first requires identifying the problem and the problem is NEVER ideology. The color orange is a certain frequency in the light spectrum and one's ideology has no effect on that. Accepting different viewpoints as valid, does not change ideology. From one perspective, the orange may appear more red, from another more yellow, but it is STILL orange. That means that all viewpoints have value and using the aggregate of them can lead to a more complete picture. Rejecting another viewpoint because it differs from one's own, is a self defeating action. Trying to get a glimpse of the bigger picture, REQUIRES examining other viewpoints. Those with a camera phone mentality will never have the IMAX 360 ability to deal effectively with problems. Too many people use "selfies" as their way of understanding the World.
You are all i***ts. Does that statement upset you?... (show quote)


Let's see if this falls under the category of "too reasonable" and quickly withers.

Reply
Feb 15, 2014 09:59:54   #
Searching Loc: Rural Southwest VA
 
rumitoid wrote:
Let's see if this falls under the category of "too reasonable" and quickly withers.


Think "beautiful, glorious colors" in your garden. Visualize them. They will start popping up, like newly planted sunflower seeds reaching for the warmth of the sun, donchaknow!!

Reply
Feb 15, 2014 10:03:20   #
Floyd Brown Loc: Milwaukee WI
 
lpnmajor wrote:
You are all i***ts. Does that statement upset you? Would it be easier to swallow if I said I was an i***t too? The answers would be yes and no, respectively, I expect. No, I am not actually calling any of you i***ts, that was a ploy. The point is, name calling doesn't do anything, except distract from the discussion. I AM an i***t sometimes, but I decide that, not you. When someone calls me a name, I either own it or forget it and then I'm done with it. It means nothing.

Labeling things or people doesn't change a thing about them or it, it only changes your attitude towards them. One person gives a dollar to a homeless man, another gives a sandwich. Which one is a liberal and which a conservative? I bet you tried to answer that question, but here's the thing, you can't, because you don't know WHY each person did what they did. You tried to label them anyway, with little information, because that's the way we have learned to do things. I suggest we stop "reading between the lines" and "mind reading" when dealing with people.. Labeling is actually SELF destructive, as it closes our minds to possibilities that might be of benefit to us.

Resolving problems first requires identifying the problem and the problem is NEVER ideology. The color orange is a certain frequency in the light spectrum and one's ideology has no effect on that. Accepting different viewpoints as valid, does not change ideology. From one perspective, the orange may appear more red, from another more yellow, but it is STILL orange. That means that all viewpoints have value and using the aggregate of them can lead to a more complete picture. Rejecting another viewpoint because it differs from one's own, is a self defeating action. Trying to get a glimpse of the bigger picture, REQUIRES examining other viewpoints. Those with a camera phone mentality will never have the IMAX 360 ability to deal effectively with problems. Too many people use "selfies" as their way of understanding the World.
You are all i***ts. Does that statement upset you?... (show quote)


As usual you have put together a good set of words.

Words that we all need to take to heart.

Reply
 
 
Feb 15, 2014 18:53:32   #
Searching Loc: Rural Southwest VA
 
rumitoid wrote:
Let's see if this falls under the category of "too reasonable" and quickly withers.


Well now, curious it is. I see a fair number of people have read lpn's thread, but only a few have responded to it. Why is that? Are the majority of you looking merely to be entertained? If so, then you have set the bar ever so low. Is it because OPP is your therapy center of choice and therefore you feel free to vent in the lowest form of insults possible? Well, you're traumatizing the rest of us. Where are all you folks who stay in the shadows, who do not speak out? Content to stay there? If there ever was a chance to speak out for rational and decent expression of thought, this would be it.

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Feb 15, 2014 19:10:34   #
Coos Bay Tom Loc: coos bay oregon
 
I have been appealing for rational and decent expression of thought for a couple weeks now. I was once a master at insults and name calling. I had fun at it but it dawned on me I was not here to rage on unknown people I will never meet. I am here to learn and to share my thoughts.
Searching wrote:
Well now, curious it is. I see a fair number of people have read lpn's thread, but only a few have responded to it. Why is that? Are the majority of you looking merely to be entertained? If so, then you have set the bar ever so low. Is it because OPP is your therapy center of choice and therefore you feel free to vent in the lowest form of insults possible? Well, you're traumatizing the rest of us. Where are all you folks who stay in the shadows, who do not speak out? Content to stay there? If there ever was a chance to speak out for rational and decent expression of thought, this would be it.
Well now, curious it is. I see a fair number of p... (show quote)

Reply
Feb 15, 2014 20:01:55   #
Searching Loc: Rural Southwest VA
 
fom wrote:
I have been appealing for rational and decent expression of thought for a couple weeks now. I was once a master at insults and name calling. I had fun at it but it dawned on me I was not here to rage on unknown people I will never meet. I am here to learn and to share my thoughts.


I know you have. There have been others as well who have made the appeal, but seemingly to no avail. My husband will be happy to tell anyone who asks that given a cause and opportunity I can have an absolutely vicious mouth. I choose to take a civilized approach because I wish to be heard. I came on board for exactly the same reason that brought you here -- to learn and give voice to my thoughts. I find myself on less and less because all I hear are insults being flung about, accomplishing nothing.

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Feb 15, 2014 20:16:49   #
Coos Bay Tom Loc: coos bay oregon
 
I guess if one were out of control of their life they could just get on a forum and rage and insult use the worst language possible to make themselves feel better perhaps powerful since the object of their outburst is not personnally there to break their face.
Searching wrote:
I know you have. There have been others as well who have made the appeal, but seemingly to no avail. My husband will be happy to tell anyone who asks that given a cause and opportunity I can have an absolutely vicious mouth. I choose to take a civilized approach because I wish to be heard. I came on board for exactly the same reason that brought you here -- to learn and give voice to my thoughts. I find myself on less and less because all I hear are insults being flung about, accomplishing nothing.
I know you have. There have been others as well w... (show quote)

Reply
 
 
Feb 15, 2014 20:38:36   #
Duckie
 
Searching wrote:
I know you have. There have been others as well who have made the appeal, but seemingly to no avail. My husband will be happy to tell anyone who asks that given a cause and opportunity I can have an absolutely vicious mouth. I choose to take a civilized approach because I wish to be heard. I came on board for exactly the same reason that brought you here -- to learn and give voice to my thoughts. I find myself on less and less because all I hear are insults being flung about, accomplishing nothing.
I know you have. There have been others as well w... (show quote)


There are over 600.000 comments on this site. Would it surprise you to know that over one half a million comments are angry? Yep, I ran a program to select particular words and it came back for this site that most of the posters are angry and try to out shout one another. There are other sites that are worse, by 4 percent. Would it also be a surprise to learn that the amiable comments are from your friends.....yes, AuntiE, Banjo, Searching, Slatten49. I will not name the offenders. That would be just rude.

It seems when patterns are initiated and not stopped that it becomes a habit. Habits are hard to break. I think that a nonresponse will k**l the thread of the some offenders and the others will continue to post, but if you do not give them the attention they are looking for, they too will stop. If a conversation is worth your time, then ignore the hostile words and move on.

Everyone's opinion(s) give us insight. Insight into personalities, the current climate in various parts of the country, as well as an insight into how policies are affecting the nation.

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Feb 15, 2014 20:48:32   #
Searching Loc: Rural Southwest VA
 
fom wrote:
I guess if one were out of control of their life they could just get on a forum and rage and insult use the worst language possible to make themselves feel better perhaps powerful since the object of their outburst is not personnally there to break their face.


Well, I'm betting some folks, as they read what you have just described, are feeling their shoes get tighter, and at the very least some people are sitting at their screens, nodding vigorously in agreement with your post. When I first came onboard in November last year, a very kindly poster told me to pay those who insult no mind because they only wish to vent. However, what I have seen, particularly of late, goes WAY beyond venting in tacky fashion. It gets down to extreme personal insults and you are right -- no consequence, like a breaking of the face, only a very safe screen with key bytes back, anonymous, like an obscene phone caller.

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Feb 15, 2014 20:56:45   #
Coos Bay Tom Loc: coos bay oregon
 
Searching wrote:
Well, I'm betting some folks, as they read what you have just described, are feeling their shoes get tighter, and at the very least some people are sitting at their screens, nodding vigorously in agreement with your post. When I first came onboard in November last year, a very kindly poster told me to pay those who insult no mind because they only wish to vent. However, what I have seen, particularly of late, goes WAY beyond venting in tacky fashion. It gets down to extreme personal insults and you are right -- no consequence, like a breaking of the face, only a very safe screen with key bytes back, anonymous, like an obscene phone caller.
Well, I'm betting some folks, as they read what yo... (show quote)


:thumbup:

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Feb 15, 2014 21:15:35   #
AuntiE Loc: 45th Least Free State
 
Searching wrote:
Well now, curious it is. I see a fair number of people have read lpn's thread, but only a few have responded to it. Why is that? Are the majority of you looking merely to be entertained? If so, then you have set the bar ever so low. Is it because OPP is your therapy center of choice and therefore you feel free to vent in the lowest form of insults possible? Well, you're traumatizing the rest of us. Where are all you folks who stay in the shadows, who do not speak out? Content to stay there? If there ever was a chance to speak out for rational and decent expression of thought, this would be it.
Well now, curious it is. I see a fair number of p... (show quote)


The answer to your quandary is the two words "will not".

The ones who do not use insults "will not" comment as they need not do so.

The ones who do use insults "will not" comment because they will continue as usual.

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