AuntiE Loc: 45th Least Free State

Lawyer: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"

Witness: "No."

Lawyer: "Did you check for blood pressure?"

Witness: "No."

Lawyer: "Did you check for breathing?"

Witness: "No."

Lawyer: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"

Witness: "No."

Lawyer: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"

Witness: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."

Lawyer: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"

Witness: "Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere."

Ted_68

Nice.
Here's one for you;
A wealthy man has been told by his doctor he only has so many days left to live . So he calls together his Pastor ,his accountant and his Lawer to settle up his will and estate. After everything is drawn up he gives each one an envelope with 10,000 in it , telling them that he is to be buried with the envelopes , and has it from a higher authority that he can make them all a big profit.
The day comes, the preacher has preformed the service , blessed the deciesed man and deposited his envelope . At the viewing he watches the accountant do the same and motions him to come stand next to him as they wait, and wait for the Lawer . Just before the funeral director is about to usher them out the Lawer bursts in and deposits his envelope and slams the locking coffin shut.
Relieved, both men thank the Lawer for showing up and the priest asks if they both have done the right thing. Guiltaly the accountant says no father I gave him the best deal ever. I have a small firm 6,400 is all that's in there .
The Pastor sighs and says with so many needy in this world nor could I my son . 4,000 is all I was able to not give to gods children.
At that the Lawer is insenced and cursing the two of them finally stating that he buried the poor soul with a check for the full amount.

Lily

AuntiE Loc: 45th Least Free State

I have multiple lawyers that will receive that!