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Running over lawyers
Jan 5, 2017 01:07:11   #
georgejc Loc: discovery bay, california
 
A truck driver would amuse himself by running over lawyers. Whenever he saw a lawyer walking down the side of the road he would swerve to hit him, enjoy the load, satisfying "THUMP", and then swerve back onto the road.

(at this point some of you are probably wondering how the trucker could distinguish the lawyers from the humans. Obviously he saw the trail of slime they left!)

One day, as the truck driver was driving along he saw a priest hitchhiking. He thought he would do a good turn and pulled the truck over.

He asked the priest, "Where are you going, Father?"

"I'm going to the church 5 miles down the road," replied the priest.

"No problem, Father! I'll give you a lift. Climb in the truck." The happy priest climbed into the passenger seat and the truck driver continued down the road.

Suddenly the truck driver saw a lawyer walking down the road and instinctively he swerved to hit him. But then he remembered there was a priest in the truck with him, so at the last minute he swerved back away, narrowly missing the lawyer. However even though he was certain he missed the lawyer, he still heard a loud "THUD". Not understanding where the noise came from he glanced in his mirrors and when he didn't see anything, he turned to the priest and said, "I'm sorry Father. I almost hit that lawyer."

"That's okay", replied the priest. "I got him with the door!"

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Jan 5, 2017 06:53:22   #
Loki Loc: Georgia
 
georgejc wrote:
A truck driver would amuse himself by running over lawyers. Whenever he saw a lawyer walking down the side of the road he would swerve to hit him, enjoy the load, satisfying "THUMP", and then swerve back onto the road.

(at this point some of you are probably wondering how the trucker could distinguish the lawyers from the humans. Obviously he saw the trail of slime they left!)

One day, as the truck driver was driving along he saw a priest hitchhiking. He thought he would do a good turn and pulled the truck over.

He asked the priest, "Where are you going, Father?"

"I'm going to the church 5 miles down the road," replied the priest.

"No problem, Father! I'll give you a lift. Climb in the truck." The happy priest climbed into the passenger seat and the truck driver continued down the road.

Suddenly the truck driver saw a lawyer walking down the road and instinctively he swerved to hit him. But then he remembered there was a priest in the truck with him, so at the last minute he swerved back away, narrowly missing the lawyer. However even though he was certain he missed the lawyer, he still heard a loud "THUD". Not understanding where the noise came from he glanced in his mirrors and when he didn't see anything, he turned to the priest and said, "I'm sorry Father. I almost hit that lawyer."

"That's okay", replied the priest. "I got him with the door!"
A truck driver would amuse himself by running over... (show quote)


Did you hear about the lawyer who got caught with his hand in his own pocket?

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Jan 5, 2017 13:14:56   #
padremike Loc: Phenix City, Al
 
Loki wrote:
Did you hear about the lawyer who got caught with his hand in his own pocket?


He must have had one of those new fangled sex operations and had his hands in his pocket feeling his change? Maybe?

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Jan 6, 2017 14:25:57   #
boatbob2
 
The ONLY thing lower than a lawyer,is whale shit,and thats on the bottom of the ocean.

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Jan 6, 2017 14:32:40   #
Loki Loc: Georgia
 
padremike wrote:
He must have had one of those new fangled sex operations and had his hands in his pocket feeling his change? Maybe?


I doubt he was playing pocket pool, he probably broke his cue stick in one of his clients.

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Jan 6, 2017 18:46:29   #
Snoopy
 
boatbob2 wrote:
The ONLY thing lower than a lawyer,is whale shit,and thats on the bottom of the ocean.


Do you know the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is slippery, bottom feeding mud sucking and the other is a fish.

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Jan 7, 2017 00:04:01   #
georgejc Loc: discovery bay, california
 
What do you call 10,000 lawyers on the bottom of the ocean? A good start.

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Jan 7, 2017 01:11:58   #
samtheyank
 
Loki wrote:
I doubt he was playing pocket pool, he probably broke his cue stick in one of his clients.


Did he have a bulge?

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Jan 7, 2017 06:22:54   #
Loki Loc: Georgia
 
samtheyank wrote:
Did he have a bulge?


Pobably not as pronounced as Mikey Obama's. I guess we know who wears the pants in that family, at least in private.

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Jan 7, 2017 06:27:34   #
Snoopy
 
georgejc wrote:
What do you call 10,000 lawyers on the bottom of the ocean? A good start.



Why do you call a bus load of lawyers going over a cliff a catastrophe? Because there were 3 empty seats!

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Jan 7, 2017 06:56:30   #
Loki Loc: Georgia
 
Snoopy wrote:
Why do you call a bus load of lawyers going over a cliff a catastrophe? Because there were 3 empty seats!


Not so much a catastrophe as poor packing.

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Jan 7, 2017 13:06:44   #
boatbob2
 
WHY??? is everyone down on lawyers??? Im down on them,because I know a bunch of these sleazebags,,,,a waste of breathing air,.

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Jan 7, 2017 13:18:38   #
Snoopy
 
To know them is to hate them!!

Snoopy

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Jan 7, 2017 14:03:36   #
georgejc Loc: discovery bay, california
 
I remember that Jesus always enjoyed the company of prostitutes and thieves, but really detested the lawyers.

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