One Political Plaza - Home of politics
Home Active Topics Newest Pictures Search Login Register
General Chit-Chat (non-political talk)
CARP - Canadian Association of Retired People
Page 1 of 4 next> last>>
Jul 7, 2015 16:02:33   #
BearK Loc: TN
 
Subject: over 60

CARP - Canadian Association of Retired People

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FROM CARP FORUM

Q: Where can single men over the age of 60 find younger women who ae interest in them?
A: Try a bookstore, under fiction.

Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to live.

Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the Bible....Is that true? Where can it be found?
A: Yes. Matthew 14:92 "and Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt..."

Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your over 60 year old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.

Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses.

Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out. Just be careful so you don't trip.

Q: Why should 60 plus year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.

Q: Is it common for 60 plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is the problem.

Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.

Q: Where should 60 plus year olds look for their eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads.

Q: What is the most common remark made by 60 plus year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember these!"

SMILE, you've still got your sense of humor!

Reply
Jul 7, 2015 16:07:18   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
BearK wrote:
Subject: over 60

CARP - Canadian Association of Retired People

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FROM CARP FORUM

Q: Where can single men over the age of 60 find younger women who ae interest in them?
A: Try a bookstore, under fiction.

Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to live.

Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the Bible....Is that true? Where can it be found?
A: Yes. Matthew 14:92 "and Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt..."

Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your over 60 year old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.

Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses.

Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out. Just be careful so you don't trip.

Q: Why should 60 plus year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.

Q: Is it common for 60 plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is the problem.

Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.

Q: Where should 60 plus year olds look for their eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads.

Q: What is the most common remark made by 60 plus year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember these!"

SMILE, you've still got your sense of humor!
b Subject: over 60 br br CARP - Canadian Associa... (show quote)


Luckily, so does my wife, the Sgt. Major. :wink: :thumbup:

Reply
Jul 7, 2015 16:46:36   #
Rufus Loc: Deep South
 
BearK wrote:
Subject: over 60

CARP - Canadian Association of Retired People

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FROM CARP FORUM

Q: Where can single men over the age of 60 find younger women who ae interest in them?
A: Try a bookstore, under fiction.

Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to live.

Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the Bible....Is that true? Where can it be found?
A: Yes. Matthew 14:92 "and Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt..."

Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your over 60 year old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.

Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses.

Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out. Just be careful so you don't trip.

Q: Why should 60 plus year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.

Q: Is it common for 60 plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is the problem.

Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.

Q: Where should 60 plus year olds look for their eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads.

Q: What is the most common remark made by 60 plus year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember these!"

SMILE, you've still got your sense of humor!
b Subject: over 60 br br CARP - Canadian Associa... (show quote)


:lol: :lol: :lol: I'm older than I thought.

Reply
 
 
Jul 7, 2015 21:16:03   #
BearK Loc: TN
 
slatten49 wrote:
Luckily, so does my wife, the Sgt. Major. :wink: :thumbup:


Hey Slats, the handy with tools one should help you. You said you spend a lot of time in the dog house :wink: :wink:

Reply
Jul 7, 2015 22:18:10   #
Rufus Loc: Deep South
 
BearK wrote:
Hey Slats, the handy with tools one should help you. You said you spend a lot of time in the dog house :wink: :wink:


Bless his heart. This is slatten at home.



Reply
Jul 8, 2015 08:56:53   #
lindajoy Loc: right here with you....
 
BearK wrote:
Subject: over 60

CARP - Canadian Association of Retired People

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FROM CARP FORUM

Q: Where can single men over the age of 60 find younger women who ae interest in them?
A: Try a bookstore, under fiction.

Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to live.

Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the Bible....Is that true? Where can it be found?
A: Yes. Matthew 14:92 "and Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt..."

Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your over 60 year old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.

Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses.

Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out. Just be careful so you don't trip.

Q: Why should 60 plus year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.

Q: Is it common for 60 plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is the problem.

Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.

Q: Where should 60 plus year olds look for their eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads.

Q: What is the most common remark made by 60 plus year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember these!"

SMILE, you've still got your sense of humor!
b Subject: over 60 br br CARP - Canadian Associa... (show quote)


These are great and your a hoot!!!!!
Thank You...Have a great day, BearK.



Reply
Jul 8, 2015 12:09:40   #
BearK Loc: TN
 
lindajoy wrote:
These are great and your a hoot!!!!!
Thank You...Have a great day, BearK.


Happy to make people smile. It should be "A smile a day, keeps the doctor away."

Reply
 
 
Jul 8, 2015 12:12:21   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
Rufus wrote:
Bless his heart. This is slatten at home.

That was taken when I fell asleep putting in my new flooring. :-D

Reply
Jul 8, 2015 12:13:32   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
BearK wrote:
Hey Slats, the handy with tools one should help you. You said you spend a lot of time in the dog house :wink: :wink:

See my previous post just above. :wink:

Reply
Jul 8, 2015 18:09:00   #
badbobby Loc: texas
 
BearK wrote:
Subject: over 60

CARP - Canadian Association of Retired People

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FROM CARP FORUM

Q: Where can single men over the age of 60 find younger women who ae interest in them?
A: Try a bookstore, under fiction.

Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to live.

Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the Bible....Is that true? Where can it be found?
A: Yes. Matthew 14:92 "and Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt..."

Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your over 60 year old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.

Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses.

Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out. Just be careful so you don't trip.

Q: Why should 60 plus year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.

Q: Is it common for 60 plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is the problem.

Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.

Q: Where should 60 plus year olds look for their eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads.

Q: What is the most common remark made by 60 plus year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember these!"

SMILE, you've still got your sense of humor!
b Subject: over 60 br br CARP - Canadian Associa... (show quote)



gosh Bear
those are great
but can you come up with anecdotes for plus 90?
I am fast approaching you know :roll: :roll: :roll:

Reply
Jul 8, 2015 18:11:44   #
badbobby Loc: texas
 
quote=lindajoy]These are great and your a hoot!!!!!
Thank You...Have a great day, BearK.[/quote]


LINDA,YOU HAVE PUT MY HEART TO FLUTTER :!:
WHAT AN AVATAR

Reply
 
 
Jul 8, 2015 18:19:14   #
BearK Loc: TN
 
badbobby wrote:
gosh Bear
those are great
but can you come up with anecdotes for plus 90?
I am fast approaching you know :roll: :roll: :roll:


That's the time to start your second childhood. Live it up while you can.

Reply
Jul 8, 2015 18:19:38   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
badbobby wrote:
quote=lindajoy]These are great and your a hoot!!!!!
Thank You...Have a great day, BearK.



LINDA,YOU HAVE PUT MY HEART TO FLUTTER :!:
WHAT AN AVATAR[/quote]
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Anything else fluttering, BB :?: It will remain confidential. :wink:

Reply
Jul 8, 2015 18:19:59   #
BearK Loc: TN
 
badbobby wrote:
quote=lindajoy]These are great and your a hoot!!!!!
Thank You...Have a great day, BearK.



LINDA,YOU HAVE PUT MY HEART TO FLUTTER :!:
WHAT AN AVATAR[/quote]

See, that's what I mean - live it up while you can.

Reply
Jul 8, 2015 18:28:27   #
badbobby Loc: texas
 
BearK wrote:
See, that's what I mean - live it up while you can.


with support from you Bear
I can face it :roll:

Reply
Page 1 of 4 next> last>>
If you want to reply, then register here. Registration is free and your account is created instantly, so you can post right away.
General Chit-Chat (non-political talk)
OnePoliticalPlaza.com - Forum
Copyright 2012-2024 IDF International Technologies, Inc.