slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

Texas Cop Arrested After Farting in Another Cop's Face

From February 18, 2014

A Texas cop wound up in handcuffs after he allegedly hit a fellow officer and farted in his face. How's that for organic tear gas?

Lago Vista Police Detective Lawrence Michael Jonap, 45, was charged with assault by causing bodily injury, the Austin American-Statesman reports.

But where does the alleged fart figure in to the charges?

In the first incident, according to the report, Jonap walked by police dispatcher Donald Varner and kicked him in the back, laughing while he did it. The affidavit says Varner reported the incident to his superiors immediately, according to the Statesman.

The next day, Jonap allegedly hit the communications operator on the head with a notebook, flicked his ear and then farted in his face.

For his apparently puerile actions, Jonap was charged with assault with injury, a Class A misdemeanor that carries a sentence of up to one year in jail and a fine of up to $4,000.

Technically, a proverbial pulling of the finger could count as assault and/or battery. Generally, an assault is an attempt or threat to injure another person, while a battery would be actually contacting another person in a harmful or offensive manner.

When passing gas, the difference between an assault and battery is when the fart makes impact. For example, a West Virginia man was once charged with battery on a police officer for farting on a cop, Fox News reports.

The rule of fart battery: If you said the rhyme and did the crime (the crime of farting, that is), and you meant it to be offensive contact, then that's a potential battery. As we learned from the classic tort case Leichtman v. WLW Jacor Communications, cigarette smoke counts, too. But that's way less fun than farts.

Perhaps the next time Jonap tries to pull a stunt (or a finger) in the workplace, he should get a formal farting reprimand.

bahmer

It seems that Texas is jumping off the deep end on this one.

lpnmajor Loc: Arkansas

As with most bullying...........that's taking things one step too fart.

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

Why am I not surprised you would raise a stink

lpnmajor Loc: Arkansas

You know the old saying "gas and ye shall receive".............or something like that. I know, that joke fell a little flatulence. I got it from Vladimir Pootin'.

badbobby Loc: texas

I see you have graduated
to deeper thinking and more important posts than your usual chit chat
and for a Marine
that's pretty good

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

Just talking chit, BB.

badbobby Loc: texas

yep
as usual
but it was a lil higher chit

badbobby Loc: texas

you been colooding with them Ruskies agin???

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

These are a gas!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CCtiQTQQ7QA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmlFzw5xvoE

bahmer

They were kind of funny in a sick sort of way I suppose.

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

OldRoy sent them to me via PM. I remembered them from long ago, so decided to send them on, as they were pertinent to the thread.

bahmer

You Marines are really a gas I'll give you that.

badbobby Loc: texas

Don't care for Carlin
too lewd for my taste
couldn't understand foxx
but I kinda liked his tv show

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

Unfortunately, although I still found him funny, the older Carlin got, the more profane and vulgar he became. Vintage skits from his earlier days remain classic. Red Foxx's skits, along with Moms Mabley's, were as blue as one could find. The following is one of her 'clean' ones...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLg1QzdAdLo